Good Media

So I did my interview with CBC, and they put me on the Homestretch July 6 (which was pretty damn good at explaining my position, if I do say so myself) and it was a news item on their website July 7. That lead to an Editorial in the Calgary Herald where they mentioned me by name, but still think the government should "go slow" on legislation. Ridiculous. They ask for an extension, they table it - it's not going to be any better. They'll just procrastinate and suffering people will go on suffering. It's not fair! I hope the Supreme Court doesn't grant them an extension. 

I understand if a psychiatriic evaluation is needed to show you're not being influenced or coerced in any way and that you are of sound mind. What are they going to offer me - a magic pill? I've been on everything. Nothing is going to make me get myself up in the morning, shower myself, get off a Foley catheter, walk myself to my commode to poop on my own, walk PERIOD, stand alone, travel, go out and about, live any sort of life. Give me a break. Are they going to give me a pill for THAT? I don't think so. My caregiver who worked this morning said (after I played her my CBC Homestretch podcast) "I wish I could take you out so you could get some joy out of life". I go out. I see things. It's not about that. My day-to-day is insufferable and I can't remember the last time I had dignity in my life. I'd like to have some in my death. 

I watched a movie the other day, "Time of my Life" about a man with MS that fought to get the assisted dying law in Belgium in 2002 and was the first to utilize it. I really need people in my life to see it. I'm worse off than he was, and I also don't have a son like he did. He left behind family and friends as well, and fought through the nay-sayers. I just had one here today - a pastor and his wife, that my mom brought by. I listened to him preach for over an hour about God and the bible and how we are not to decide when our lives end. He kept saying "I understand" and he sympathizes and he's so sorry and blah blah blah. HE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND. Nobody can say that. He talked about family and friends who have suffered and that he knows what I'm going through. PLEASE! You do NOT. And, I'm not going "through" anything - there is no end to this.  Nothing to get THEOUGH. If I could get through it, I totally would. But there is no end until my life ends. And I'd like that to be sooner rather than later! Sorry, nay-sayers. You can't make me change my mind no matter how much you try and instill the fear of God and Satan and Hell into me. God knows my plan. He supports me, I'm not worried about that at all. My mom, by the way, supports me in this decision, as hard as it is on her. She didn't know that pastor and was really mad at him - it was SUPPOSED to be a discussion, not a preaching session. He was supposed to hear my side, but all he wanted to do was talk about his. He made me SO mad. 

Anyway, this was to be posted awhile back but as usual I procrastinate and write a little bit here and there without posting! If you google "CBC Homestretch" past episodes, scroll down to July 6 and you can hear me talk about Assisted Death. Or download the July 6 podcast, which is how I listen on my iPad.