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Sunday, January 12, 2014

Hurry Up and Wait

I have been thinking about this blog and updating my story since my last entry. But since I don't already have anything that I can just copy/paste and adjust from, it's once again overwhelming to think of it all. I'm still trying to recover from Thursday - 3 days ago - when I had Botox injections for my bladder. It was a very long,difficult day, and I had some horrid flashbacks to Sept. 21, 2012 that makes me wonder if I'll ever get past it. 

I had to go to the day surgery unit at Foothills hospital for these injections. And because I'm going on the OR table and can no longer stand without a LOT of help and the proper equipment, I have to call non-emergency ambulances to take me on a stretcher both ways. From here, they were supposed to pick me up around 11:30 am. Thalia was here to help me out all day as well. I was to be in the unit by 1:00, but the EMTs didn't even arrive until around that time. 

Once at the hospital I was transferred from the EMT stretcher to the day surgery bed, which isn't much better than a stretcher. There I waited while the nurses did whatever they needed to do and Thalia filled out whatever forms needed to be filled out. I was wheeled to the pre-op area around 2:40, where I laid for about 45 minutes until they were ready for me in the OR. By this time I was in a lot of pain from laying in the same position on their uncomfortable beds, and not allowed any meds/ibuprofen until afterwards. 

In the OR I was transferred to their table, where on one side of me I had a doctor trying to find a vein to get an IV started (I can't drink past midnight so I was severely dehydrated, making it that much harder to find a vein, which are hard to get at the best  of times) and on the other side they're stretching out my bad arm to put on a tight blood pressure cuff, and at my feet I've got nurses trying to get my legs in the stirrups for the injections. I'm CRYING in pain from all areas. It took so much painful poking to get even the tiniest IV possible in me, and then the sedative or whatever meds he had hurt like hell! I was more awake than ever for the procedure, I guess because they couldn't get a good vein for the meds. The procedure itself takes all of 15 minutes. Then they replaced my catheter, transferred me back to the wheelie bed, and rolled me to recovery. 

I stayed there for about half an hour before they wheeled me back to the day surgery unit. Thalia was there to greet me. The nurse assigned to me was a complete idiot and even put my blood pressure cuff on upside down. She got a terribly high reading and when she left Thalia fixed the cuff. "Artery THAT WAY. Now they'll see a proper reading next time". I was hooked up to oxygen through my nose, blood pressure cuff, that oxygen thingy on your finger, and the IV. Terribly uncomfortable, but nobody removed anything for hours...

I was able to eat and drink now, so I had some mini-muffins Thalia picked up and some water. I was looking forward to a decent meal when I got home, since the EMT had been called and I didn't have to be in day surgery anymore. The idiot nurse kept thinking I'd have to "get up and pee" before I could leave, and then "oh that's right, you don't get up..." And I'm on a catheter and peeing all along, dummy. Anyway... Another nurse kept telling us the EMT was to arrive later and later, as they were having a busy night. You never knew if you were going to get EMT or 9-1-1 paramedics, it depends who is available. I imagined it could be the paramedics who screwed up my life on Sept. 21, 2012. I was shaking and imagining how I'd react to seeing them. Screaming, shaking, "DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME!!" And more screams. My body shivered and spasmed. So I guess I'm not over that. 

I had downloaded "Burning Love" to my iPad for Thalia and I to watch while we waited. I was SO UNCOMFORTABLE. I did get an Ibuprofen and Thalia gave me my baclofen, but nothing seemed to help. I ate a hospital turkey sandwich. So much for a decent meal after so many hours. I just wanted to go hooooome!

We watched the entire first season of "Burning Love" before the paramedics finally arrived. I was finally unhooked from all the tubes (just to have the paramedics hook me up again, but whatever) and was transferred to their stretcher, down to the ambulance for the drive home. Because I had been lying there for so long all day/night and was in so much pain, there was concern how to get me safely onto my lift chair because I didn't feel confident to do a normal stand/pivot from the stretcher. So THESE paramedics did the right thing without even a suggestion, and called the fire dept. for backup. So even though I was right outside my building, more waiting was in store until the firemen came. 

Once everyone was here, they wheeled me inside where I asked that I get on my exercise table to use my Chi Machine instead of the chair, as I needed the circulation provided by the machine and I was going right to bed after, anyway. So they wheeled me over to the exercise table and put the stretcher at an angle and down so low, there would have been no way I could stand from it, anyway. Plus I couldn't quite reach my pole. They promised they would not let me fall, and the group of them worked together to get me safely on the table. SAFELY! It was all done correctly! 

Then they packed up and left me and Thalia alone. Thalia took off my shoes and AFO and helped me lay back so I could use my Chi. Ahhhhhh! 30 minutes on that thing and I was able to stand/pivot again. I went straight to bed, where Thalia rubbed down some of my aches and pains and slathered me with Motion Medicine (a sort of Ben-Gay product that actually works). She spent about 12 hours with me that day, I was thankful I could give her the next day off so she could take a break and Christina worked. 

So I'm almost fully recovered from that ordeal, I think! My right arm hurt like hell all night and the next day but I think it's back to its normal pain level, although still bruised up. I'm having second thoughts about going for Botox again. This was my 4th time, but I think I'll just see what happens when I let it wear off completely. It's supposed to help with the pain having a catheter in my bladder gives me, because of all the bladder spasms. But I don't know how bad it would be now. Maybe I'm delusional, forgetting how much pain I was in before and now that I DON'T have a choice between a catheter or going to the toilet, I should just suffer through this every 6 months.  But I'm weary. 

On Saturday, my mom and stepdad brought over my new (to me) wheelchair van! I'm not able to try it out yet, but hopefully this week. Thalia took it to put gas in it tonight. $120 later! Wow. It better last a long time. I hope this van rides better than my last piece of junk, that I didn't have long, because it turned out to be a piece of junk. I also hope I fit in it okay. It's a full sized van, but there is no raised roof or anything, so fingers crossed the last owner wasn't a tiny person with a low wheelchair! Mine is very high, but my stepdad swears he measured everything. Here's hoping!


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